Published by Open Love Letters


"To someone, anyone, 

This couldn't have come at a worse time for me. My partner of almost 7 years left me at the end of January and just as I was emerging out of the emotional fog of that trauma, I have found myself a prisoner in the home that we still own together. 

There are good days and bad days. I am lucky enough to have a stable job in these unstable times, and can work from my living room. But in-between the bouts of productivity, the running I force myself to do for my brain's benefit, and eating beans on toast - I am lonely.

I cannot concentrate on the TV and find myself pausing whatever I'm watching every fifteen minutes or so to busy myself with some meaningless household task. My washing basket has never been so empty. But I miss him. I miss the touch of somebody else, the safety in the familiarity of someone sleeping next to you at night.

On Saturday night I got dressed up, painted my face and poured a glass of fizz for an online evening with friends. It was as close to normal as I'm going to know for the foreseeable and theses new ways of communicating are going to get me through this migraine of a year.

I know it will pass. I know I will feel better. I know that I will hug and hold everyone I love suffocatingly tight once this is done. I know that tomorrow might be a good day.


Anon. X"